Why you need a “tribe”: for moms
Patience Domowski, LCSW
Women are social creatures. We need friends to talk to, significant others to vent to, grandparents to support us, and therapists to guide us. We need people. Moms, especially new mothers, and mothers of children with special needs, often struggle to make friends. They are so caught up in caring for their new child/children, organizing their children’s activities and appointments, keeping their spouse (moderately) happy, and (maybe) keeping the house clean, that they don’t have time or don’t focus on making other mom friends. But it’s really necessary!
Moms need someone they can go to to ask those questions like “am I crazy or…” as well as “is my kid normal, he does…” and get some feedback from other women in the trenches as well. Moms need someone to hang out with, call to chat, and someone to help out when you just need a break.
Whether your social supports are your family, your spouse’s family, your neighborhood group, friends, or people in your church program, you need supports, you need friendship, you need a “Tribe”. Other women who can help you, listen to you, laugh with you, cry with you, and just be there for you.
Ways to find mom friends could be connecting with others via online forums like Facebook, blogs, etc, meeting moms at the local playground, parents of your children’s friends at school or daycare, coworkers, others in your church group, etc. Try to think of where you could be more intentional, what you could get more involved in, or whom you could try to start up a conversation with. The other person doesn’t have to be a mom. The other person doesn’t have to be a woman (though that might make your husband jealous!). The other person just has to be someone who cares, someone who is there, someone you can call and talk to, hang out with (virtually or in real life!), and is supportive of you and your family.